Women to Avoid (The Complimentary List)

- Nikki Minaj/Barbie

The thing with Ms. Minaj is, I strongly believe she’s crazy. Yeah, she’s got a bad body. And she’s got bars for days. (I’ve actually had many conversations with some friends, talking about how Nikki is accomplishing what Lil’ Kim may/should have been trying to accomplish. Facial antics included.) That being said, there are some beautiful, amazing, women out there…and some of them have a number of personalities that pop up that the weirdest times. One minute, they have you walking around saying “My Chick Bad”, and the next, “My Chick Outta Her Freakin’ Mind”. This woman doesn’t even have to be at the extreme of being diagnosed with clinical schizophrenia. It generally has to do with an utter lack of consistency. She likes you and lavishes you with attention, then she doesn’t. She’s dainty and sensitive; all of a sudden, she’s more like UFC fighter than model, and not in a good way. Most women are generally baffling to men; this woman is certifiably confusing to others (and herself). Stay clear, because chances are you’ll end up with more than a headache.

- Snookie

This kind of woman has a dangerous tendency to be over-obsessed with her looks. Now, a little make-up isn’t a bad thing, especially when it compliments her natural beauty. To some women, it is an outlet of creativity and individuality. But…there are those women who spend WAY too much time focusing on the right skinny jeans and the most fly hairstyle instead of their job/classes/responsibilities. When you encounter a woman who is way too concerned with the external and regards the internal with a question mark, this should be cause for concern. This is more than being confident; she should be able to do something with all that confidence. Hear me; I am a full-on advocate of some blush and lip gloss…but she doesn’t even know what she wants out of life and starts a chant of “help me, save me”, you should probably head for the door.

- Lil’ Mama

I shouldn’t even call her a woman, because at times, she would resemble more of a lil’ – I mean, little girl. We all saw what Lil’ Mama did at the VMAs. Everyone was chilling, enjoying what is sure to be NYC’s new anthem. Jay and Alicia Keys were wrapping it up, throwing it down in a real way. The vibe was right, everyone was in a great mood…then here comes Lil’ Mama. Not Nas. Not the Mayor of New York City. Not the entire Yankees roster. Not anyone who would make sense. Lil’-freakin’-Mama. This woman? It’ll almost seem like she’s intentionally trying to bum rush her way into a chill scene, just to start some mess. The focus has to be on her, or else she’ll start feeling insecure and all that mess. Know that everyone has their set of baggage. But when that baggage starts frequently cramping everyone else's style, it’s a problem. No one likes a blatant attention seeker. Especially if she can’t be classy with it.

- Oprah

We are in a new era of Man-Woman relations. We’ve come a long way from not even allowing women to vote, or work in certain positions. The thing is, and as a Christian, this is my own personal conviction, men have a certain standard of respect and self-respect that cannot be broken or challenged, something that inherently felt. I’ve heard more than one man say in more than a few ways that he could deal with quite a few things, but once disrespected, something unspoken is shattered, almost irreparable. It has been psychologically assessed that just as women have the need to feel treasured and loved, men need to be respected. With that said, she could be bringing home the bacon and the steak, with enough left over for some chicken. However, if the man is not recognized as the leader of the relationship/family, something is severely wrong. She is not better than him, he is not better than her; they need each other to make it work – but if she doesn’t respect him, he’ll struggle to show love (and thus the cycle begins…). And if that’s the case, how can they truly interact with each other as adults?

- Lauryn Hill (Post-Miseducation)

I personally feel that this is the most dangerous woman to get seriously involved with, moreso because if she is beautiful, it can distract us men from what is truly important. Once again, as a Christian, this is of the utmost importance to me. If a woman cannot connect with, or speak to you eye to eye on a deeper, meatier level, she is quite frankly not worth the time. I’m not even talking about the capacity to speak with intelligence. Mental depth should be a given when speaking about a Woman. I’m talking about a woman who cannot talk with spiritual clarity, a woman who does not have a direct, intimate relationship with her God. I’ve heard it said before that a woman’s heart must be hidden in God in order for a man to find her. I echo that sentiment. I would feel such conviction if I didn’t mention this, because without this foundation, I feel that everything is relatively shallow. Because of God’s relationship with His Bride/The Church, I believe that it is the blueprint for Man/Woman/Wife relationships. If, at the end of the day, no matter how many arguments or disagreements or slip-ups, if you both cannot arrive at the cross on bended knee, leave her. She is not worth compromising your relationship with Your Father.

- (Fake) Mother Teresa

As a part two, this particular woman causes me a whole lotta heartache. First, let me state that we are all fallen creatures. Busted and falling short each day, we are constant works in progress. However, this is not a pass. If we are saved, we are to constantly strive to daily redemption. With that out of the way, this woman is a charlatan. It’s one thing to struggle. It’s another to front as if you’ve got everything on lock. The whole double-life notion should scare you, because it is typically a sign of a lack of trust, or some deeper issue. Much like The Nikki Minaj, she switches up like Lynchburg weather. If she’s not the same woman on Tuesday as she is on Sunday, it’s time to start asking some questions. It’s also another problem if she has no humility about herself. Conviction is a sign of the struggle we have with sin; once that is gone, we start cooling off, becoming that dreaded lukewarm believer.

- Khia

Almost winning the title of the Most Annoying Woman, this woman is quite the thorn in many a side. She LOVES flapping her gums. She lives for gossip and other people’s business. I would compare her to The Snookie, but that may be giving her too much aesthetic credit, as The Snookie at least takes pride in her appearance. Recklessly popping off at the side of her neck, this woman has zero class. A t-shirt and sweatpants may be real cute in college, or if you’re just lounging on a Saturday. But if your boys are at the crib, and she strolls by in a (not cute) too-small tee and she hasn’t brushed her teeth yet, time to regulate. She might disguise it as “keeping it real” or being your “down chick”, but if she’s going to call herself a woman, there should be a standard of class. Think about it. How much of a fan of pointless gossip and foolish babble are you? How much silly chatter can you tolerate? Do you have a high capacity for ignorance? If you look up one day and realize that you don’t want this woman to meet your mother/family/friends for fear that she may embarrass the mess of you, then it may be time to sit her down and have that good ole chat with her.