2.05.2010

A [Biased] Open Letter to the Genders


To the fellas,

So...to the majority?

I'm not here to judge, by no means at all. I don't know your personal struggles, your history, nor the weight you take each day. I believe that while we may have different definitions of hurt, pain is pain, whether a pin prick or a stab wound. And while I may not know all of you personally, I write this with a heavy heart:

Be men to your women.

And off the top, I know at least 5 dudes that would respond and say something like, "I don't know whatchu talkin' 'bout, I'mma man wit' mines, bruh."

All the same. Be men to your women.

Whatever the process may be, however hard it may seem, I strongly urge you to please. Be men to your women.

Because they need us. We exist in a world where women are rising to the occasion, a struggle that has been being fought for decades, almost centuries. There is still heavy, but silent debate on exactly what a woman can or can't do. But all the same, (it is my firm belief) that God has placed a responsibility on us males to handle more than "bringing home the bacon". Instead, we must first make sure our home is in order.
I'm not going to propose a ten-step program on "How to Be a Better Man in 2010". But we know what the deal is. We can laugh with our boys, we can bump dozens of hip-hop songs about "getting mine" and "everyday I'm hustlin'", but the era of single/teenage mothers and rising abortion rates, it past due time to be men to our women.

Love them. Honor them. Respect them. Because at this rate, we truly don't deserve them.


Disclaimer: (Let me first state that I am speaking to the majority. I know many fellas who are the exception, rather than the rule. Life tosses many variables, so to assume that 100% of the men of planet Earth fall into this category would be foolhardy. To you brothers, kudos, and keep on keeping on.)

To the ladies,

I don't know anything about being a woman. I would often joke about how I don't want to know anything about being a women, but I readily admit that it was spoken in pure ignorance. Just being stupid. All the same, I feel the urge to reach out to you. Call it young, call it dumb, call it softer than Charmin's, my heart aches at the things I've been witness to.

This is a freewrite, so I haven't even thought this part out. I think I just want to commend all the single mothers, teenage mothers out there. On the behalf of all the willing men, I am sorry for our failures and misfortunes as men. We have done wrong, and gotten beyond distracted. We have fallen in lust with so much more than that which deserves our attention. From Kardashian to quesos, we allow ourselves to take the easy way out instead of the honorable thing  of treating you like the gifts you are.

I'm not an anti-male, feminist or anything.

But I do know wrong when I see it. And we have been wrong to you.

Disclaimer: (Once again, this is written to the majority. I know that just like the fellas, there are a number of ladies who aren't on their "act right". While I may not know all the circumstances involved in that, I will say that I urge you - just as strongly as the fellas - to realize how important a community is and why we really need to do what is necessary to pull it together. Just like there are some beautiful females, there are some outstanding men. Be willing. Be patient.)